Our Beloved Daughters Deserve More!

I have two beautiful daughters. They are at opposite ends of the developmental table–my oldest is in her teen years, while my youngest is in her toddler years. Both fill me with pride. I envision the kind of women I hope they will become and the life they deserve.

I understand that today’s young teen girls will be the women of tomorrow. What kind of women will today’s teen girls become? That depends on the influences surrounding and impacting them today, doesn’t it? How are they learning to about themselves as females? About males? What are they learning in their most important relationships at home, in school, in the community at large?

Well, from what I see, hear, and am told, it’s quite a mixed bag. Young women today fear committed relationships just about as much as young men, but for different reasons. Young women today view their bodies as an object to be manipulated about as much as men do. Young women do not understand nor appreciate their feminine soul–and so it is a greatly neglected part of their life. Young women have decided that marriage is not as important to their future–a marriage that includes children in particular…and on and on….

I don’t know what most people think about this, but I have to say, I believe our beloved daughters deserve a brighter, more rewarding and meaningful future than this….

Becoming What You are Capable of Being

In the words of Matthew Kelly, a favorite speaker/author/writer of mine,

Everything is a choice. This is life’s greatest truth and its hardest lesson.

Those words are powerfully true, they’re from his book, The Rhythm of Life: Living Every Day with Passion and Purpose. I’m currently reading this marvelous book. And I have to tell you, if you read only one book this year, make sure its this one! If you want to cast your net out into the deep waters of understanding yourself, others, and the world around you, this is the book! Most important of all, if you are ready to commit yourself to understanding and doing what is absolutely necessary to become what you are capable of becoming as a person–realizing your true potential–this is the book to read, the book for you.

This book has helped me examine my own life more deeply and step more fully into the “rhythm of life” where passion and purpose are a part of each day. Are the things you do and the things you say helping you become what you are capable of being each day? I hope so because it just makes the journey so much more worthwhile.

Re-affirming Love

The anniversary. It’s so important when it comes to re-affirming love in marriage. Anniversaries are celebrations of milestones in marriage. I’ve got an anniversary coming up soon myself. I’ve been thinking a lot about it lately too. I want to make it a very memorable time with my husband. I want to capture and share the things we’ve experienced in years gone by…our struggles and triumphs…our joys and aspirations…I want to look at how much we’ve grown as a couple and as individuals.

I want to remember how my husband’s actions, words, and encouragement has helped me become more and do more to enrich my life and our life together…. Yep, I want to look back and remember and celebrate it all. I want to re-affirm my love, respect, and appreciation of my beloved and the life we have built together. Got an anniversary coming up? Make it a priority to re-affirm your love! Nothing’s more important.

How well do you handle yourself?

I’m convinced that a failure to discuss and effectively resolved issues between two people is partly because one or both refuse to do what is necessary to handle themselves in the situation. It can play out in the following ways:

1. Person “A” refuses to acknowledge that there is in fact an issue
2. Person “A” also refuses to admit that the issue is his/her own (meaning it’s a personal need, worry, disappointment, concern, or whatever)
3. Person “A” acknowledges that there is an issue, but refuses to take any steps to understand it better for him/herself or to help the other understand it and how it affects him/her or them as a couple
4. Person “A” admits that there is a issue and that he/she needs to discuss it, but does not take responsibility to negotiate a time to discuss the issue with the other.

Person “A” above does not do what is necessary to deal with the issue. What is necessary is the acknowledgement of a concern, need, or issue–be it personal or relational–deciding whose concern it is, and setting up the time to try to understand it. If we want to relate well to those most important to us–and others in general, we need to act in ways that communicate that. How do you behave when an issue arises between you and others? Are you handling yourself well? I hope so because the quality of your relationships depends on it!

Young Adults Today Reject What They Mistakenly Think Marriage Is

I came across a wonderful quote by the infamous Catholic Bishop Fulton J. Sheen that got me to thinking about reasons young adults reject marriage today. Years ago, Sheen stated the following:

Not 100 in the United States hate the Roman Catholic Church, but millions hate what they mistakenly think the Roman Catholic Church is.

It occured to me that the same can be said about marriage. In today’s cultural environment, marriage is the butt of every joke—for example I recently saw a commercial where two women, apparently at a wedding reception, are sitting together at a table having yogurt and commenting on how good it is—as they go back and forth sharing their opinions in comparison to other things they consider good, one of them finally comments that the yogurt is “Not catching the bouquet” good. The message being that marriage is undesirable—according to the tradition of catching the bouquet, the woman who catches it is next to marry. This innocent little dialogue about yogurt effectively implies that marriage is not something desirable or good.

Now, drawing from the wisdom reflected in that great quote of Bishop Sheen here’s what I believe—there are few who actually see marriage as undesirable, but rather many who reject what they mistakenly think marriage is and thus find it undesirable! With roughly 95% of the population in this country expecting to marry we need to get an accurate view of what marriage really is. That’s my twist on a great quote.  Your thoughts?