How well do you handle yourself?

I’m convinced that a failure to discuss and effectively resolved issues between two people is partly because one or both refuse to do what is necessary to handle themselves in the situation. It can play out in the following ways:

1. Person “A” refuses to acknowledge that there is in fact an issue
2. Person “A” also refuses to admit that the issue is his/her own (meaning it’s a personal need, worry, disappointment, concern, or whatever)
3. Person “A” acknowledges that there is an issue, but refuses to take any steps to understand it better for him/herself or to help the other understand it and how it affects him/her or them as a couple
4. Person “A” admits that there is a issue and that he/she needs to discuss it, but does not take responsibility to negotiate a time to discuss the issue with the other.

Person “A” above does not do what is necessary to deal with the issue. What is necessary is the acknowledgement of a concern, need, or issue–be it personal or relational–deciding whose concern it is, and setting up the time to try to understand it. If we want to relate well to those most important to us–and others in general, we need to act in ways that communicate that. How do you behave when an issue arises between you and others? Are you handling yourself well? I hope so because the quality of your relationships depends on it!